BigSaltyDog

  Episode: Sgt. Salty & Gildig’s Car Hunt Chapter 3 – Opel: The Spongey Saga Sgt. Salty and Gildig Maxwell strutted into Opel Springfield , greeted by none other than Barney Gumble in a half-buttoned shirt. “Welcome to Opel… burp … can I interest you gents in a test drive? The Astra is a smooth operator!” “Smooth operator?” Salty raised an eyebrow. “We’ll see about that.” Moments later, they were on the road in a shiny silver Opel Astra . Salty pressed the brake at the first junction. SPONGE. The pedal sank like it was made of jelly. “FFS! These brakes are softer than Moe’s sponge cake!” Salty barked. Gildig, clinging to the dashboard, added, “I’ve squeezed firmer tomatoes!” Salty floored the accelerator. The Astra groaned and reluctantly crawled forward. “Pickup speed’s poorer than Grandpa Simpson on a Monday morning!” Salty laughed, wheyyyyyy echoing down the street. Barney hiccuped from the back seat. “It’s a family car , not a rocket ship…” Salty smirked. “Even...