🎉 Another Walshyy Birthday — 2026 🎉 The Party That Probably Should Have Been Stopped at the Planning Stage Everyone was making their way to the Party. And, as was traditional for a Walshyy birthday, nobody was entirely sure who had organised it, where exactly it was being held, or why there appeared to be a military tank approaching from the direction of the motorway. But then again, this was 2026. Normality had officially left the building. Leading the procession was Salty, naturally. And Salty wasn't driving some boring family hatchback. Oh no. Salty was driving a Leopard 2. The enormous tank rumbled majestically down the road, Salty sitting behind the controls with the relaxed confidence of a man who had absolutely no business being in charge of several dozen tonnes of German engineering. He was dressed smartly, as usual, wearing sunglasses despite the distinctly Irish weather. "Salty," came a voice over the radio. It was Whizz. "What?" "Why are you ...
The Grand Tour of Salty HQ** The next morning, Lucy arrived at Salty Base of Operations , which looked—depending on your eyesight—either like: A state-of-the-art tactical HQ or A glorified shed with ambition Salty insisted on the first. The misfits insisted on the second. As Lucy walked through the gates, the entire squad perked up like meerkats on caffeine. Sarah nudged Susan. “She’s here! The new Solider!” “She’s far too pretty for this place,” Susan whispered. WhizzAir Winky ran up first, skidding to a stop. “PRIVATE LUCY, REPORTING FOR… eh… VISITING!” She saluted back dramatically. “Permission to look around?” “Aye, granted,” Salty said, puffing out his chest like a proud rooster. He guided her deeper into the compound. There were half-assembled gadgets, a couple of suspiciously smoking crates, and The Govna arguing with a vending machine about “constitutional snacking rights.” But none of that caught Lucy’s attention. Because suddenly… She saw it ....
Gardaí and Army Bomb Disposal Called to Malahide Home After Shed Clean-Out Residents in Malahide, Co. Dublin, were given an unexpected reminder that you never quite know what you might find when clearing out an old shed. Gardaí and members of the Army Bomb Disposal Team attended an address in Malahide today after an item believed to be potentially dangerous was discovered during a shed clean-out. The discovery was made while the shed was being cleared. Rather than taking any chances with the object, the occupants contacted the authorities, who quickly attended the property. The area was assessed by Gardaí before the Army Bomb Disposal Team was called in to examine the item. The Army's bomb disposal experts subsequently removed the object from the property for further examination. It is understood that it has now been taken away so that it can be safely identified and assessed. While incidents like this can understandably cause concern for local residents, the presence of the Army B...
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