Chapter 4 — Ye Olde Large Lad Gets Serious
Chapter 4 — Ye Olde Large Lad Gets Serious
The sun wasn't even properly awake.
The Misfits were.
Well... most of them.
Inside the makeshift training camp, McFinleyyy was drinking coffee, Govna was looking for breakfast, WhizzAir was checking his drone batteries and Finholio was polishing something that probably didn't need polishing.
Then came the noise.
CLANG.
Everyone stopped.
CLANG.
Quags looked up.
CLANG.
Quagmire sighed.
“Oh no.”
McFinleyyy nodded.
“He's started.”
From inside the gym came another enormous metallic CLANG.
Ye Olde Large Lad was awake.
---
He stood in front of the weights.
Silent.
Focused.
Serious.
The sort of serious normally reserved for people defusing bombs or trying to assemble IKEA furniture without instructions.
He looked at the barbell.
Then at himself in the mirror.
He nodded.
“Today...”
He paused.
“...we train.”
He grabbed the bar.
CLANG!
The first lift.
CLANG!
The second.
CLANG!
The third.
His muscles were working overtime.
Sweat poured down his face.
The entire building seemed to shake.
Finholio appeared at the doorway.
“Are you alright?”
Ye Olde Large Lad didn't answer.
He lifted again.
Finholio nodded slowly.
“Right.”
Then he quietly walked away.
---
Outside, Sarah and Susan were watching through the window.
Sarah smiled.
“He's getting ready.”
Susan nodded.
“For what?”
Sarah shrugged.
“Whatever happens next.”
Then Ye Olde Large Lad walked out.
He was wearing combat trousers, boots and a vest.
He looked like he'd just walked off the set of an old-school action film.
He stopped.
Looked towards the horizon.
A gentle breeze moved through his hair.
McFinleyyy stared at him.
“What's he doing?”
Salty took a sip of coffee.
“Wait.”
Ye Olde Large Lad slowly turned towards the group.
He cracked his knuckles.
Then his neck.
Then both shoulders.
CRACK. CRACK. CRACK.
Finholio whispered:
“Should we be worried?”
Salty nodded.
“Yes.”
---
Ye Olde Large Lad walked towards the equipment table.
He picked up his kit.
One item at a time.
Boots.
Gloves.
Helmet.
Radio.
He put everything on with the precision of a man preparing for the most important mission of his life.
Then he stopped.
Looked directly at the camera that absolutely wasn't there.
And delivered his best Arnold Schwarzenegger-style action-hero impression:
«“I’ll be back.”»
Silence.
McFinleyyy stared at him.
“That was terrible.”
Ye Olde Large Lad looked offended.
“Was it?”
Sarah nodded.
“Very.”
Susan smiled.
“Absolutely dreadful.”
Finholio applauded.
“I loved it.”
Ye Olde Large Lad nodded.
“Thank you.”
Then he pointed towards the gym.
“Now...”
He paused.
“...more weights.”
---
Back inside the gym...
CLANG!
CLANG!
CLANG!
Ye Olde Large Lad was lifting again.
Salty walked past the doorway.
“You finished yet?”
“No.”
“Why?”
“Need bigger arms.”
Salty looked at him.
“You've already got arms like tree trunks.”
Ye Olde Large Lad nodded.
“Not big enough.”
He lifted again.
CLANG!
Salty walked away.
McFinleyyy followed.
“Is there a point to all this?”
Salty shrugged.
“I stopped asking questions about twenty minutes ago.”
---
Finally, Ye Olde Large Lad emerged.
He looked ready.
Really ready.
Sarah and Susan gave him an approving nod.
WhizzAir launched the DJI drone.
Finholio climbed onto the Leopard 2.
Quags checked his equipment.
Quagmire looked around.
“Where's the food?”
Everyone ignored him.
Salty looked at Ye Olde Large Lad.
“You ready?”
Ye Olde Large Lad nodded.
“Ready.”
Salty smiled.
“Good.”
Ye Olde Large Lad looked towards the horizon.
Then he delivered one final action-hero line.
“Let's go.”
He took three steps.
Stopped.
Turned around.
“Actually...”
Everyone waited.
“I forgot my protein shake.”
McFinleyyy put his head in his hands.
Sarah burst out laughing.
Susan shook her head.
Finholio shouted:
“THE GREAT WARRIOR NEEDS HIS JUICE!”
Ye Olde Large Lad pointed at him.
“Exactly.”
Salty sighed.
“Five minutes.”
Ye Olde Large Lad smiled.
“Make it ten.”
Salty stared at him.
“Five.”
“Deal.”
The Misfits climbed aboard the Leopard 2.
WhizzAir's drone rose into the sky.
Sarah and Susan climbed aboard.
Finholio secured himself beside the turret.
And Ye Olde Large Lad finally arrived with his protein shake.
He climbed aboard.
chapter 4 Took one enormous gulp.
Looked at the Misfits.
And smiled.
“Now I'm ready.”
The Leopard 2's engine roared.
BRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOM.
Ye Olde Large Lad raised his fist.
“Let's move!”
And somewhere behind them, Quagmire shouted:
“WAIT! YOU FORGOT THE SANDWICHES!”
Salty closed his eyes.
“I'm going to need a bigger tank.”
TO BE CONTINUED…

Comments
Post a Comment